i thought that this blog would be just about happy homemaking stuff. i had the xanga for the normal everyday goods and bads of life. but now this is what i've got. so this is where i'm gonna unload.
in jan. 2010 my son married a wonderful girl. i love my daughter in law with all of my heart and we have become close.
her mother hates me. she is jealous of our relationship and she has taken it out on her daughter.
when they married her mom abandoned her. she called it "giving them space" she didn't need space. she needed guidance still. she needed a mom.
for 3 1/2 years i have been there. i have spent time. i have helped out. i have encouraged.
she has been distant, even though she lives very close by.
she didn't come to the hospital when her daughter gave birth to our grandson.
we were all there.
she has griped and whined about every holiday that she didn't get their total time and attention.
as if our son has no family.
recently it boiled over. she was totally ignoring her daughter.
my daughter in law would cry and wonder why.
all because of one word
JEALOUSY
now, to be fair, i am at fault here.
i love my family
i believe in being there for them always
in word and deed
i love spending time with them
i want everyone to love them
i want everyone to be there for them always
in word and deed
i want everyone to love spending time with them.
instead of being happy that her daughter is married to a man that has a family that is loving, caring, and involved,
she thinks we are too involved
because we include each other in things
because we try to help each other as much as we can
because we love to spend time together.
i'm frustrated by all of this
even more so because this woman is a pastors wife.
such a poor example.
it finally came to a boiling point recently. and my daughter in law and her mom spoke about all of these issues.
hopefully her heart will be changed.
hopefully she can accept the fact that its not about her.
or me.
i want her to be close to her daughter.
i want her to be close to our grandson.
i'm praying that this will happen.
i really needed to write this.
Karen! "The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man/woman availeth much". Another translation is about "the persistent prayer of a godly man/woman is powerful indeed". I know it's in James but I forget which chapter and verse. Dig yer heels in and keep on keeping on praying! God wants to heal relationships in families - ALWAYS!!! Dig yer heels in and you and Jeff pray for this together. It is God's perfect, primary, ordaining will that family relationships be healed, strengthened, restored... but often we need to pray first for the conversion of all parties involved to be (more) deeply converted to Jesus and the Gospel. Pray for that first and everything else will fall into place in God's perfect and exquisite way and time.
ReplyDeleteI have been in an intercessory "travail" over a family issue for the past few years. I am a child of divorce. My parents have not been friends in 40 years. We are all hurting, though I'm the only one who admits it. Our family was so beautiful and happy despite some trials, before a certain incident took place. Until we all forgive each other from our hearts, we will not be healed... until we forgive each other from our hearts, we will not be worthy of Heaven. Pray for the gift of everyone in your family forgiving each other! The feelings might not be there for awhile, but pray that the Holy Spirit will convict everyone in their spirits that they need to forgive, to make acts of their will to forgive.
I'll pray for you all, and I humbly ask you to send up even a two second prayer for my family. Lately, there have been some signs of encouragement. I still cry every single day about the brokeness in my family, and also about the brokeness in the families and marraiges in the entire world. My mission in life is to pray for the healing of families and that children be protected from divorce.
'Nuff outta me. :) Your family will be in my prayers even more. I pray for you every day.
- Big hugs in Jesus,
Chris
I am sorry that you are hurting Karen. And I am sorry for your daughter-in-law's mother's attitude. It is so awful when there are family 'issues', so called. And it all stems from selfishness and greed. So many times our human nature just goes wild and we want, want, want....everything our way. I have been there....and it is not pretty. Having said this, I want you to know that I am joining you in prayer for this situation. God hears. He takes control. All will be well. Sending you a cyber hug. jane
ReplyDeleteI hope and pray that they can come together, and you all can do things as a family and not feel such a division. And yep, sometimes things just need to be written out like that. (((Hugs))) and prayers! -Spinnermom
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