This morning I deactivated my facebook account.
The world
near and far
is becoming too much for me right now.
So I drank my cup of coffee, showered, and went outside for a walk.
Sat on the swing out back
Came back inside and made a picnic lunch for Jeff and I,
Then went to church.
It's the real world that matters. The one right here. The one I can touch. The one I can make a connection with and feel like it really matters.
I've made a few really wonderful connections through the internet. Friends for life even though we have never met in person. I actually made those friends through blogging (xanga) but we all wound up on facebook.
That is the part that tugs at my heart.
After church Jeff and I went to a nearby beach with our chairs and our picnic lunch. It was cloudy and not quite 70, but it was very relaxing. We talked a lot. We have a lot of conversations lately about me letting go of things. Expectations mostly. Trying to live my life for me, for us, and not for everyone else. I guess I'm still having a really hard time switching gears between motherhood/full nest and grandmotherhood/empty nest. How dang long should it take? It's been 10 years!
I'm very thankful for all of my grandchildren (there's 12) But I have to keep reminding myself that I am no longer the center of that world. I'm on the periphery. I'm a satellite and not planet mom.
The sooner I accept that
The happier I will be.
Thanks for popping in on my blog. I grew up not far from the coast in CA. Now live in the Appalachian mountains in NC. While I love it here, I dearly miss the ocean and bay beaches. Great photo that made me sigh. It's really hard to let go of expectations. And I also find it is often very disappointing and aggravating to just take everything however it comes. It's often so hard to count on anyone's word or actions. Expectations... yeah, I know what ya mean. Always working on giving up expectations, not easy. Sigh.
ReplyDeleteWe all deal with expectations, don’t we. It’s especially hard when ours are unmet! There is freedom in acceptance (not always easy) and letting go. I have one left at home, he’s 16. Four married, seven grands. It’s been challenging at times, but good too. God is opening up new opportunities.
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