you are gone.
there is no time left to fix what was broken.
even when you were still here
pride kept ears shut and hearts hardened.
i'm sorry.
i'm sorry i didn't try harder.
once i was strong enough, secure enough, confident enough....
it was too late.
it became a God thing.
i love God more than anything or anyone.....
including family.
this is the power that drove me away.
i was being called to something different.
something great.
something that is the opposite of the world.
something the world hates.
i thought i spoke the truth in love.
i made mistakes.
i always do and i always will.
but forgiveness was not to be.
forgiveness is impossible
in a pride filled world.
i wish our lives could have been different.
i wish that i could have been an influence for good in your life.
but i went a way that you didn't want to go.
i'm so sorry for that.
i prayed for you every single day.
it feels weird to not pray for you anymore.
it's been hard to write this in so many ways.
one way is me having to speak guardedly
because my words will be turned into weapons.
which is not my intention.
you were my little sister for so long.
we shared a history
that you chose to re-write.
a history that i set out to make a distant memory
to change the results of
to change the direction of
to move on from.
this is hard.....
because this letter is not for the dead.......
................................but for the living.
with love,
your sister,
karen
karen, liz, judy
karen, bob, judy
judy, karen
bill, judy, karen
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